Engaged Twice

We are engaged! Yes, officially now. The ring that Allan gave me that night formalized his question and I, wearing it in my finger (proudly as I type my words here), reconfirmed my consent to, well, marry him.

We were already engaged even before he slid the ring in my finger. He already popped the question months before he purchased that band for a pre-wedding commitment. He asked, I said yes. He already had my affirmative reply during his “unofficial’ proposal and that, itself is a strong pledge of my love – stronger than the ring, I think.

I did not ask for the ring. I do not honestly think it was necessary. But he had a different viewpoint.

Let me recall what happened that night he proposed.

It was our first night in Baguio City together. I am not familiar with the place but I was too keen about this trip so I prepared an itinerary beforehand. We are going to 50’s Diner for our first dinner in the city according to that itinerary.

We dressed up. I wore a floral dress and a peach-pink cardigan to warm me up. But who am I kidding? I never thought Baguio City would be so cold in November! The cold would seep through my cardigan and into my skin. Allan asked if I brought anything else (which he called a jumper) than the cardigan but I told him it was all I got. He knew I could not be a warrior in the cold so he brought out his Hilfiger jacket and covered me with another layer. He put on a dark blue knit shirt and a pair of trousers. I was silently amazed with the charm he effected on me just donning that. He looked so handsome that night I lose my concern that he would freeze outside because I was wearing his jacket. He did not mind.

50’s Diner was not far from Microtel. It was jam-packed with diners that we have to wait to be seated. The restaurant has a vibrant atmosphere – with food orders shouted out and followed up, echoing laughter and exciting buzz of several groups of friends, loud music, and the noise of eating utensils. In fact, when we finally got our table, Allan and I can barely hear each other. We would often turn to our iPhones and gaze at each other. We fulfilled our mission that night nevertheless: we were full up when we left our table.

Allan was still up to going somewhere after dinner. He asked if we could go walking in a park nearby. But it was drizzling that night and the road, slippery. Besides, I have no idea where else to go especially at night. So I suggested we better return to the hotel which we did.

We reached our hotel room full in the stomach but apparently unsatisfied. So we both sat in silence on the sofa. It seemed like an understanding of what we needed that night: a peaceful, romantic night which we were deprived of during the dinner earlier. Moments later, I realized we were already talking about our families and about us. I never felt very comfortable talking and listening to him like that before: my head on his shoulder and his right hand entangled with my left hand. He came to that point asking me what if he asks me to marry him again. Looking up at him, the words came off naturally from my lips – I would say yes over again. He smiled and held my chin to kiss me and I let him. The next thing went so suddenly that when I opened my eyes several seconds after, he was already on his knees revealing the ring on his left palm. He said he should have done the ‘kneeling’ part months ago when he first asked me to marry him. Anyway, he popped the question again in proper form and with the ring. No, I did not gasp and cover my mouth in feigned surprise if that was what you were expecting. I expressed what I was feeling then with a tight embrace and a whispered ‘yes’. He let me go eventually so he can slid the ring in my finger.

Allan sat back beside me. He was apologetic that the proposal which he just did was not as exciting as the first one. I don’t think he understood. It was my first time to be presented a ring and a determined question about marriage by a man. It was my first ever time to feel that a man is taking me seriously, that I am someone’s ‘for keeps’. Allan brought me to yet another life’s purpose-realization moment that I actually have a significant existence on earth. I mattered, and that is one big exciting matter for me!

Now that I think about it, the ring may still not be necessary but it concretized Allan’s steadfast intent to have me as his partner for the rest of his life and my permission to be so. He said that the ring is important because he wants people to know that I am his. Need I say more? I wear the ring to flaunt what I also want the world to know: I am engaged to a man I truly love!

We were officially engaged November 6, 2010, two days before our anniversary. Allan was so worried he might misplace the ring if he waited two more days to propose.

Help me pray for our love to flourish!