Tonight I Cry In Silence

My pains, my troubles

I whispered to the darkness

'Cause your absence doubles

My hunger for happiness.

The darkness always replies in silence

And embraces me with sympathy.

It eagerly awaits and listens

Whenever I want company.

For what use are words

If we are worlds apart?

What significance is a call

If we haven't much time to share, from the start?

I'd like to tell you everything

That bothers my mind and soul.

But I end up saying nothing

Unsure if I can trust you at all.

If I tell you now, would you listen?

Would you even care?

Or would you probably hasten

'Cause they're calling you out there?

Another day, another night

I always wait in vain.

But I also always try to fight

With all my might, the pain.

For what more is painful than not

Having you here beside me?

When you are the only one I got

who knocks me off completely?

So tonight I cry in silence

And whenever there's no you.

I tell the darkness, in pretense

That tomorrow I'll be with you.

-- Tinao

Cardology

Cardology - the art of making my heart melt by simply sending me cards -- in a surprising or clue-ing manner.

Traditional, yes, but when I receive cards from loved ones, my heart goes giddy-ly happy and sings shalah-heh-shalah!

I got this really special card from Allan for Christmas. Only it arrived a little late for last Christmas or a little early for this year. It does not matter because I super love the card! It has our photo on the front cover which I think is so sweet and the words inside were just, ah, perfect to take my breath away.

Thank you, Allan. I still think you're the sweetest thing on earth. Sweeter than chocolate.

How to Eat Pandesal with Hot Choco

When confused, food naturally becomes a good company in lieu of, well sometimes, a person. That's why they coin something called 'comfort food'. Exactly what, food gives you comfort.

On my way to work today, I passed by a store which sells pandesal (the traditional bread of Filipinos which means 'bread of salt', thanks to my Spanish clas s in college). The store is called The Bread Bag. It opens as early as 7:00 AM. I looked at their menu, and I felt greedy instantly. I must be really hungry. :)

So how to best eat pandesal? With HOT CHOCO! Coffee will do too! 1. Pandesal in the bag for sealed freshness and the hot choco to match it.

2. Hot and healthy. It's wheat pandesal!

3. Break thy bread, share if you may!

4. And now the best part: Dip it! Yummy!

Enjoy pandesal everyday.

New Beginnings

Anytime is always a time to begin if you want to. But the New Year is a classic point of hoping, planning, and deciding to make things anew or simply welcoming changes. I cannot believe it's 2010 already. It seemed like it was only yesterday when I resolved to be a better and not a bitter person. I told myself I would be forgiving and ever-learning. I committed to enjoy my life each day, and not to expect things about tomorrow because it might not come. These were what I had on mind when I welcomed 2009. Now that 2010 is here, I still want to become a better, forgiving, and ever-learning person. I still do not want to expect about tomorrow, but rather, carpe diem! Expect not, keep hopeful. Add a little faith, if that is the most I can do. Stick to my family and swarms of true friends -- those people who stuck with me unsolicitedly especially when I was wretched and lost. Late last year, I took another shot at love, sure. But there is nothing wrong with loving myself more, which I do now. There is nothing wrong with protecting oneself -- it is the most basic human instinct. Besides, if I did not learn from my past [terrible] experience, I do not know if I could still count myself human. Father Bok cited me as an example during his Homily last night. [He did not mention my name though.] He recounted how I would cry with so much emotional baggage when asked about my former boyfriend. But even in between sobs, with so much faith, I told him that everything's not yet finished. The best is yet to come. He told his audience that, now that 'she' [referring to me] has a new boyfriend who is abroad, she apparently is happier. He added that the new boyfriend makes her happy. Father Bok's statement makes me want to stand up and certify that fact. People with me at the choir's nook would glance and smile at me. They knew I'm on the grill. It does not bother me though. It is not finished. Live. Laugh. Love. Make each new beginning hopeful and do not stop till victory is at hand. God is faithful! Happy New Year!