senseless and random

i didn't even bother to fix my title. i just want to blurt some things. while doing this, im catching up with an old friend. she made me smile. her name is as 'nice' as Nice. :) i did loveD (okay, the 'D' is the key letter, okay?) him. i felt what we have was real. only it wasn't right for me, and even for him. not for us. i miss him. and hell, who are you to laugh at me? first love lasts (like an impression, and it, too, dies soon). it didn't matter if he looks like a monster. or like a wreck. or a monstrous wreck like shrek. i know and feel better than any of you. judge if you may. i maybe stubborn, or careless. but i am enjoying my life. because i loved. only not good enough for him. not brave enough for him. here present. i am hoping to love more. someone is coming. my Lord makes me feel so. someone God-sent. someone who will pray with me. someone i'd enjoy laughing with, till i run out of breath. someone i'd look in the eye and return me that look that says "message received" without necessarily talking. (ang weird ko na.) and yeah, someone who'll tell me i'm weird but will still hug me tight and kiss the top of my head (sweee-et! but he has to be really tall). someone who'd sing with me too, and wouldn't care if I or he sings out of tune. we'd get along. if he's not all of these, it doesn't matter. so long as i know, he is God's gift, i'd gladly take it. now i need to get back to work. i am so missing someone now. not my ex, silly. someone else. haaaayyy.